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Who Remembers DPF?

Welcome to the wonderful world of DPF

In Memory of Tommy the creator and friend to many AB's

Who remembers DPF

Back in 1985 or there abouts, I was living in Sydney Australia, not even knowing that others enjoyed being babied like I did.

Like most AB's back then, I thought I was crazy and the only one that wore nappy's for there intended purpose and had been doing it since I was about 11, although I remember when I was 4 or 5 at a Christmas party in a children's home being jealous of the other children wearing bibs while I didn't and when I went to the toilet, there were terry nappies on radiators and plastic pants on racks in the corridor. I wanted one but dare not take them.

Below are some bits and pieces from the DPF website back in 1997

It wasn't what Brian had expected at all. It wasn't what he thought a Freshman's first month at college should be like. After all, in high school Brian had not only been popular but one of the class leaders. In his graduation yearbook they had even written, "Destined To Go Far".

Brian had been reasonably confident during his first few weeks at college, even if the routine of being a new pledge at a fraternity was sometimes quite hectic. But in the last few days things had suddenly taken a bad turn - a weird turn at best. It certainly was not what he expected, and it was scary. He didn't understand it at all, even though he had played with the idea of regression in his mind many times. He even sometimes fantasized that he was a baby again, but of course he never told anyone about this. Then this crazy stuff started happening!

It started yesterday. On the way back to his fraternity house from Freshman English he had suddenly felt a little weakness in his bladder. Just a little, but it was frightening nonetheless. As he had walked past the 7-11, he felt the need to pee and struggled to pull in his muscles. He sucked in hard and stained to hold back, but it happened anyway. Just a little, but enough to leave a tiny, dark wet spot on the front of his light blue shorts. On reaching the fraternity house he had rushed into his room. Fortunately no one had noticed. He rapidly changed his shorts and hid the slightly wet ones in a safe place to dry.

But today was different. This was worse. It was bad. Unbelievable. It had happened right as class was ending. He felt that weak feeling again, and then helplessness as a little pee leaked into his jockey underwear. He rushed out of the class and began to run down the pathway to get to the frat house and his room as fast as possible. But even as he ran he knew he was losing the battle. Already he could feel warm wetness soaking into his pants and running down his legs. He felt like, well, he felt like a little boy, not a college Freshman.

He was panting hard by the time he got to the fraternity house. His eyes darted left and then right as he tried to make sure nobody would see him in his embarrassing condition. As he approached the front door he knew that one thing was sure. This had to stop. He had to get to the bottom of it, to know what was happening and why. He would have to find a doctor in this new town, and do it by himself, because he could not let his folks know. Not now, anyway, until he had more knowledge of what was happening to him.

Finally he reached for the knob on the door and began to open it slowly, trying to see if there was anybody inside. It looked clear, so he pushed the door open ever so carefully. Until ...... and then........

Suddenly all hell broke lose. Two or three of the active members grabbed him by the arms and held him firmly. His roommate, Bill, was even one of them. They were all laughing as they pointed at the huge, dark wet spot on the front of his pants.

He felt like crying. "Why! What the hell are you doing?", he yelled. Then he swallowed hard and tried not to whimper.

"It's working, it's really working", yelled one of the guys holding him. "Year, but we promised to bring him in now, so we better bring him in", said another. They began to drag him into the next room, the small annex room next to the downstairs living room.

As Brian felt himself being pulled into the annex, he was startled to see the same person who he had seen grinning at him in class. It was the same person who had watched him with a big grin on their face - right at the moment that the first trickle had begun to flow into his pants. And that person was grinnng now. "Why that same grin", he wondered. "Damn, what is this all about?", he demanded out loud.

He stared blankly into the face grinning at him. Then he heard words that almost made his heart stop.

"You are so cute, Brian. From the beginning of the year I've want you to be my little boy. You are going to be my little boy, whether you want to or not, and it looks like you're well on the way, doesn't it?".

The grinning person was pointing to his wet pants, and then suddenly this person reached out to him and began to hug and kiss him. Brian felt himself almost swoon in a combination of embarrassment, excitement, disbelief and wonder. The hug and the smile both belonged to (Code 2a -Gary, the fraternity house Pledgemaster) or (Code 2b - Debora, the President of the sorority next door).

The Never Ending Story Code 2a.

Brian's cheeks flamed red hot with embarassment as the fraternity pledgemaster, Gary, hugged and kissed him. His mind was working overtime; nobody had seemed surprised at the wet patch on his trousers, in fact, they appeared to have been expecting it. "Well, well, well Brian," said Gary, "it looks like my little baby has a problem holding in his pee. A certain lack of bladder control, eh Brian?" "Let me go you bastards. There's nothing wrong with my bladder. I just spilt something down myself." Brian shouted them. The rest of the frat brother sniggered at that but Gary, the president looked sternly at Brian. "You're a very naughty boy, Brian. If you swear again, I might have to wash your mouth out with soap. And if you lie again, I might just have to give your bottom a good spanking. Look at yourself, even as I am speaking to you, your wetting yourself even more." Brian was shocked to realise that it was true. He desparately tried to clamp down tightly on his bladder muscles but it had no effect. A real flood of piss erupted from his dick soaking his pants and running down his legs. He looked down to see it trickling over his shoes and collecting in a puddle on the floor. "What's happening to me?" he cried out. He pulled away from Gary and ran for the door. He was quickly apprehended and dragged back before Gary. Suddenly, he felt something snap inside him and he started to scream at the top of his voice, like a kid having a tantrum. Words came out in a complete babble making no sense at all. "There, there, stop sceaming Brian. Let your daddy take care of you." Gary said putting his arm around Brian again and pulling his head down onto his shoulder. He stroked the top of Billy's head gently and continued "Come with daddy and we'll get you all cleaned up." All the fight had gone from Brian and he let himself be led upstairs to one of the bathrooms. Gary stipped off all of his wet clothes and lifted him into the bath. Rolling up the sleeves of his own shirt, he began to wash Brian's body from head to toe. Brian was still sobbing, but quietly now. Once he had him all clean Gary lifted him from the bath and dired him off thoroughly. He led him back through the frat house in front of all of his frat-brothers. They all smiled at Brian. Brian felt incredibly confused. He didn't understand what was happening to him. As much as he hated to admit it to himself. He'd enjoyed being washed by Gary, and he felt strangely comfortable with Gary close by. The first thing Brian saw when they got to Gary's room was the large diaper and plastic pants on the table. Brian struggled to pull away from Gary, but his hold was too tight. "Now, now, Brian. You know that you are going to need to be diapered. We can't have you wondering around campus wetting or messing yourself and you know that's what will happen. It'll be much better if you let daddy diaper you, because then when you have your little accidents you won't need to get embarassed." Gary laid a towel out on the floor and laid Brian down. Two of the frat brothers held on to his arms to stop him getting away and Gary proceeded to give his backside a final drying. He sprinkled talcum powder liberally over his genitals and backside and proceeded to fit the diaper in place. Then he pulled the plastic pants over the top. "I expect your feeling a little sleepy now aren't you Brian?" asked Gary. Amazingly, as he said it Brian felt incredibly tired. Gary produced a large pair of kids pajamas and dressed Brian in them. He lifted Brian up off the floor and planted a big wet kiss on his lips. "Who's been a good boy for daddy then?" he said. Gary pushed a dummy into Brian's mouth and carried him into the next room where Brian saw a large crib. Gary laid him down in the crib. The only difference between this crib and a normal baby's crib, apart from the size, was that this one had a top, which effectively made it a cage. Gary locked Billy in and although Billy wanted to protest, all he could think of was sleeping. Within seconds he was fast asleep. When he woke up, the first thing he was aware of was ....... (4a-a crib and changing table) (4b-20 sorority sisters with paddles in their hands)

The Never Ending Story Code 2b.

Deborah hugged Brian for a long time, holding him up against her body. Brian soon recovered from his excitement and wonder and shook his head in disbelief. He tried to pull away from Deborah, but she jut held him that much tighter.

Brian shouted, "What the hell is going on here. Are you all nuts or something? I'm not going to be anyone's baby!" Deborah replied, "Oh yes you are honey, you've already started wetting your pants and I assure you will wet your bed tonight. By tomorrow you will be both wetting and messing your diapers without any control." Everyone started laughing, but Brian who was now on verge of completely breaking was on the verge of tears.

Brian asked Deborah, "You can't do this to me! No one can control someone else's body functions. I must have a bladder infection and I'll go to the doctor tomorrow and have it checked. I'm not wearing diapers for anyone!"

Deborah told him, "Yes, I can and will do it to you and the sooner you accept the fact that you are going to need me to mother you and take care of you as my baby boy, the better things will be for both you and me. Now stop struggling and we'll go upstairs and I'll get you out of those wet clothes and give you a nice warm bath and change you into a nice dry diaper and some nice pretty blue baby pants I brought special for you."

With that Brian took all his efforts and broke out of Deborah's arms and bolted for the door. He didn't get half way to the door before his three of his fraternity brothers grabbed him and held him. They then carried him upstairs to his room and Deborah followed.

When they got Brian to his room the fraternity brothers held him on the bed while Deborah undressed him. They then carried him naked to the showers as Brain kicked and screamed all the way. By now Brain was crying like a baby and felt like one. Deborah was wearing her swim suit under her dress and got in the shower to give Brian his bath. By now he had lost all his fight, but still crying like a baby, he just cooperated as she proceeded to wash him. She first washed his hair with baby shampoo. The she washed his face gently using Ivory baby soap. She the washed his chest, back, arms, and legs. Now she washed his diaper area in great detail.

They took Brian back to his room where Deborah took a pacifier out of her purse and gave it to the crying boy as he laid down on his bed. Deborah now told him to be a good baby while she diapered him. Brian suddenly screamed and jumped up and tried to run for the door, but his fraternity brothers caught him and laid him back on the bed and use their fraternity paddle to spank him until he told them he would be a good baby and let Deborah diaper him.

They then rolled him over on his blistered butt and raised his legs and spread them apart as Deborah placed a very thick diaper under him. She then rubbed baby lotion into his sore bottom. Brian enjoyed this very much. She not applied a liberal dose of baby powder and they lowered him down on the diaper.

When Deborah started to put lotion on his privates, Brain made a feeble attempt to push her hand away. When She slapped his hands away he just laid there and cried. After she massaged in the lotion she the sprinkle baby powder all over his privates and chest. Then she rubbed the powder in. Now pulled the diaper up between his legs. She took the left side of the diaper and pulled it together very snug and pinned it with a turtle diaper pin. She the pulled the right side of the diaper together, having him first pull his knees towards his chest, and pinned it tightly on the boy. When Brain let his legs down the diaper was so tight it hurt his testicles, but he didn't dare protest. He stood.

Next they took him to Deborah's room in the Sorority House where he saw (3a - a crib and changing table) (3b - 20 sorority sisters with paddles in their hands)

The Never Ending Story Code 3a.

Deborah took baby Brian by the hand and led him into the nursery. There was a crib, a high chair, lots of stuffed animals, a dresser with baby cloths in it, baby food, and of course a changing table with a changing mat with little pink elephant patterns all over it. And of course it was stocked with 40 or more thick, nursery pattern diapers. Brian, seeing all of this, felt an exciting stir of sexual pleasure about his body that he had never felt before. Suddenly Deborah grabbed Brian's crotch and said "Awaa, little baby Brian made a wee wee, that's soooo cute!" Brian, realizing that the strange sensation was him wetting himself, tried to speak in his defense, but the pacifier gagged him.

Deborah led him by the hand over to the changing table and coaxed him onto it. As he laid back, Deborah tied a frilly pink baby bonnet on his head and said "There, there, little boy, I'll have you cleaned up in just a minute. Now lie still like a good baby." Once again Brian tried to speak but Deborah had changed his pacifier for a baby bottle filled with warm milk. Brian decided it was futile to resist and submitted to Deborah. As he sucked the milk through the rubber nipple, Deborah began to change him. She pulled the adhesive tabs on the sides away from the diaper, making that delightful ripping sound that we all remember, and spread Brian's legs. She pulled the diaper away from his crotch and down onto the table. "You even have a baby-sized "pinni", it is soooo cute", Deborah said, as she lifted Brian's legs and pulled the warm, soggy diaper out from under him. Brian blushed and decided he was beginning to enjoy this.

Deborah took out some baby wipes and cleaned Brian off with the touch of a mother's caring hand. Then she pulled a thick, white diaper with little yellow bears on it out from underneath the changing table. Deborah unfolded the diaper and slid it under baby Brian's tushie. Deborah then applied a handsome amount of baby oil on Brian's bottom and topped it off with baby powder. Brian was uncontrollably erect by this time. Deborah saw this and said" I knew you would enjoy this; doesn't it feel good to be put back into diapers !" Brian just sucked on his bottle like a good baby and let his mommy finish changing him. Deborah laid Brian's legs down and spread them. She folded the diaper up and onto Brian and fastened each tab smugly into place. "There, now doesn't that feel better?" Deborah said. "Yes, mama." Brian whimpered. Deborah put the pacifier back into Brian's mouth and helped the baby down. They walked over to (6a-the crib) , (6b-the high chair).

The Never Ending Story Code 3b.

Brian was in a state of shock at what he saw next. He was now in Deborah's room, but he wasn't alone. He looked at the line of young women all with paddles in their hands. His train of thought, assuming he had one at that moment, was interrupted by Deborah's voice. "I thought you might be trouble, and now from your actions I see that you won't make this easy for me. I discussed this with my sorority sisters, and they agreed to help me prepare you. Now to insure that you aren't a bad boy, every time you are bad, each of us will punish you separately. This is just to show you what will happen in the future if you are a bad boy" With that two of Deborah's friends in one synchronized motion placed him in handcuffs and shackles. At this Brian completely lost any composure he had left and tried to run, but he only succeeded in sending himself to the floor against the shackles. As he lay on the floor he bruised his wrists trying to pull them out of the cuffs. All the while he was screaming incoherently at the top of his lungs. The next thing Brian felt was a large piece of duct tape being slapped across his mouth. The women then stood him up, took the diaper off of him and sent him down the line. One after another they administering his punishment. Two thirds of the way down the line a large woman put Brian on his back and began re-diapering him. Brian was confused, to say the least, until he calmed, enough to realize the woman was speaking to him. While she diapered him she spoke of his delicate skin and how she couldn't spank a baby bare bottomed. When she picked him up off of the floor an lay him across her lap, he was astounded at her strength Brian winced at the strong woman's attack on his already sore bottom. For the first time since the entire ordeal began, Brian was glad to be diapered. Brian was confused when she finished paddling him, because she didn't pass him on to the next person in line as the others had done. Brian had long since lost any struggle he had left, so he allowed her to reposition him on her lap without incident. When she repositioned him, Brian found himself sitting on her lap crying into her shoulder. He continued to cry as she stroked the hair on his head and spoke to him as a mother would to calm down a child. When Brian calmed down and stopped crying she stood him up and passed him to the next woman. Brian was devastated. He had hoped that his ordeal was finally over. and began wailing again through the tape on his mouth - even before anything further happened to him He cried all the louder when he realized that his diaper was once again being removed. "Oh, no, they're going to paddle me some more", he thought. But he was wrong. A great sense of relief came over him as Deborah came over to him and said with a smile, "I think you understand now and I presume you are ready to be my baby". With that she (5a-began to rub some sweet smelling baby lotion into his sore behind) (5b-began fondle him as she outlined what his new life was going to be like)


The Dates: From Friday, July 25, 1997 throughThursday,July 31, 1997

Camp CABADL (Camp for Adult Babies And Diaper Lovers) is private and exclusive - no one else will even be allowed near the Camp. Camp CABADL is a Camp for Big Babies, "Special" Kids (fantasy), Diaper Lovers and their Mommies and Daddies.

AB Camp DPF 1997
AB Camp DPF 1997

AB Camp DPF 1997
AB Camp DPF 1997

Comfortable Bunks - - - - - - - - Camp Cabins

Are you a (fantasy) "big" or "little" boy or girl (or an adult) who still wets your bed? Or your pants? Do you do it 'cause you like to, but you can't tell your regular friends. Would you like to go to a camp where all the other "kids" and grown-ups are just like you - big babies or "kids" or adults who have to (love to) wear diapers for protection. You won't need to be ashamed anymore because all the other "kids" and adults at camp will be dressed just like you - wearing a Camp CABADL T-shirt and a diaper. Nestled in a hidden valley in beautiful mountains just a few hours north of San Francisco, Camp CABADL has everything a "special" kid or adult could want from a camp experience. It's a place where kids and grown-ups can unwind, explore and play in an environment where "special needs" are shared by all. There are comfortable cabins and bunk houses. Beautiful meeting rooms for fun and games. A fabulous dining room where great camp meals are served. 260 private acres with miles of trails to explore. Wild animals to observe, like quail, turkeys, hawks, opossums, raccoons, rabbits, squirrels, dear, and an occasional bear. A large hot tub and sweat lodges. A magnificent pool to swim and play in. Outdoor games and places to meet your friends. A Campfire where the camp director (the real owner) will tell tall tales of Pomo Indians and exciting stagecoach trips when Camp CABADL was a stagecoach stop in 1871. Evening star gazing. Videos to watch. Lots of special events to keep everyone happy and excited (to be announced).

AB Camp DPF 1997
AB Camp DPF 1997

Beautiful Hills For Hiking and Nature Study

Six nights and seven days of real camp experiences at rates so low that this camp will sell out quickly. All rates include wonderful meals - much better than those normally served at a "kid's" camp. There also will be a private bus to take campers from either downtown San Francisco or San Francisco Airport to Camp CABADL, and vice versa (small additional charge). Or you can drive to camp in your own or a rented car. All rates include a free Camp CABADL t-shirt. Baby shaped disposable diapers will be available at camp at a low cost. Cloth diapers are welcome - but each camper must supply their own. Camp CABADL will accommodate 45 to 60 campers and adults in cabins and the main lodge. Up to 150 additional campers can be accommodated in comfortable tents - to be supplied by the camp. Is never rains at this camp in the summer and there are almost no insects. The weather is clear, warm and sunny during the day - and cool at night.

List Of Accomodations

Rooms & Rates Per Kid or Adult (all rates are for 7 days and 6 nights and include all meals). Shorter stays may be possible in tents, but priority will be given to 7 day Campers. All rooms have semi private showers, toilets and sinks (this is a camp, remember) 3 Queen Beds in Cabin (3 private rooms) - $400 for single occupancy, $300 each for double occupancy. 2 Queen Beds in Cabin (1 semiprivate room) - $350 for single occupancy, $250 each for double occupancy 2 Queen Bunk Beds in Cabin - top and bottom - (1 semiprivate room) - $350 for single occupancy, $250 each for double occupancy 1 Bunk Bed in Cabin - top and bottom (1 private room) - $350 each person 2 Bunk Beds in Cabin - top and bottom (1 semi private room) - 300 each person 1 Fold-out Couch in Cabin (private room) - $350 2 Futon beds in Cabin (2 private rooms) - $350 for single occupancy, $250 each for double occupancy 4 Futon beds in Cabin (one large room) - $300 for single occupancy, $225 each for double occupancy 2 Queen Beds in Lodge (2 private rooms) - $350 for single occupancy, $250 each for double occupancy. 13 Bunk Beds in Lodge - top and bottom - (3 rooms, 4 or 5 bunk beds per room) - 300 per person Small Tents for 1 Camper. $175 Small Tents for 2 Campers. $150 each Family Sized Tents for 3 Campers. $150 each Family Sized Tents for 4 Campers. $125 each

After you decide what accomodation you prefer, go to "Make Your Reservations Now. Special Groups can reserve a room, cabin or tent by paying a deposit for the maximum number of people accommodated. The Dates: From Friday, July 25, 1997 @ 2:00 pm through Thursday, July 31, 1997 @ 2:00pm.

Priority will be given to Listed DPF members. For additional information you can either: (a) Subscribe to the DPF Newsletter, or (b) write for additional information. DPF, Suite 127, 38 Miller Avenue, Mill Valley, CA 94941, USA.

Also, you can email your reservations to Tommy now, and then send the $75 deposit afterwards. Do it now before all bunks are gone.


Steven, Roster p-924. Mail-Box # 2862. Steve hopes to bunk with a Mommy or female, and considers himself a grade-schooler.

Richard, Roster p-935. Richard is bringing his adorable girlfriend, Mary Ellen. They prefer to bunk with (in order of preference): (a) a bi or spright couple or single females, (b) Lesbian couple or single females, (c) Gay couple.

William is an unlisted member. He's bunking with John who was last listed on page-723. They want to share an accomodation with Robert, Roster p-1020. Mail-Box # 1150. and his girlfriend, Julie.

Jon, Roster p-991. Mail-Box # 1752. Jon is (hopefully) going to be the bunk councelor (daddy) for 4-6 gay boys of any age who like to be in diapers. The last I heard was that he has quite a few lined up.

Ronnie, Roster p-949. Mail-Box # 2997. (Printed) PHOTO ALBUM-p.96. Ronnie is looking forward to a lot of fun at camp.

Louis, Roster p-960. Mail-Box # 2119. Louis is coming with Jean, his wife (Mommy). They're looking forward to spending a week "with their own kind".

Steven, Roster p-974. Mail-Box # 2124. email: Steven is bringing three other friends, one male and two females.

Ed, Roster p-964. Mail-Box # 3109. Ed made his reservations early so as not to miss out on the fun.

Robert, Roster p-1020. Mail-Box # 1150. Robert's Mommy (wife) is bringing him to camp and expects take good care of her little boy.

Goo goo Go Go Dancer

What a great story! What great illustrations! Could it be a fantasy or could it be true? Well, you'll wish it were true. This comic has something for everyone regardless of your sexual orientation or your interests. A handsome young stud from Australia, Joey Osborn, is visiting his Uncle in the US. While he's here he wants a job. What a job he gets - as a go go dancer in a club owned by his Uncle's lady friend. She's been looking for someone young and handsome like Joey to play the part of a "very special" go go dancer. She "tests" Joey to see if he can win the part, and he "wins". And what part it is, and what a surprise for Joey. You'll love how the other male dancers react to Joey's new role, and "help" him get dressed for the part. Then the entire audience, which is practically all female, falls in love with Joey and his new "act". They want more and more of him, and you'll see why. You'll also see what happens to him on stage. Well, I bet you can guess what happens - and it's not just an accident. This is possibly the best Comic every published by DPF, and our first full comic by Bojay (yes, he's back). We hope to have more from Bojay in the future, but in the meantime you're gonna love "The GooGoo Go-Go Dancer" NOTE: Comic Book is in black and white.

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Goo goo Go Go Dancer Cg $22.00

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Diaperman Comic

At Megopolis U., Michael Adamson’s alta ego is “Diaperman” - fetishist and freedom fighter. His arch enemy, Mark Richter, becomes “The Spanker” with evil and powerful desires to rule the world.In fights between good and evit, students and faculty find themselves plagued by wet and poopy pants. Of course Diaperman always comes to the rescue (with diapers, of course). Even the football team and football coach find themselves in diapers, (and they like it). Will Diaperman win or will The Spanker win, and who will end up in diapers? Maybe you!! 24 pages.

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Diaperman Comic Cn$22.00

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"Diaper Daze"

A typically rebellious teenager has been turned into a docile and submissive infantile plaything. Watch him behave like a real baby. His mind must be screaming with humiliation and embarrassment, yet he meekly submits to every baby treatment you can possibly imagine. Eric stands there while his stepmother pats his behind to feel the load in his pants. He lies down on the living room floor and lifts his legs so his stepmother can change him. He does everything a baby does, and right in front of his stepmother1s sister and her 14 year old son. WHY??. This comic book will give you the answer.

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"Diaper Daze" Cd$22.00

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"Fraternity Baby" COMIC BOOK

During pledge week, this young college freshman learns that he will have to be a baby, wear diapers all the time, drink baby bottles and act like a baby. He must stay in the frat house in a playpen while his pledge mates go to class. He is humiliated. His pledge mates have to change his diapers whenever he is wet. But, soon, unbelievably and uncontrollably, he begins to like it. He begins to feel himself turning into a real baby and can not stop it. One of his pledge-mates even becomes his daddy. Based on a true story that actually happened at U. of California.

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"Fraternity Baby" COMIC BOOK Cm$22.00

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Dear Friends

Tommy creator of DPF
Tommy creator of DPF

Dear Fellow Babies and Diaper Lovers, Some of you might like to know something about the person who has created the oldest and largest organization of AB's and diaper lovers in the world. I would love to tell you who I really am, not just some superficial, historical facts about my life. To say "I love diapers" is certainly true, but that tells you very little about the "real" me who lives inside those diapers. Is it possible to to tell you who I really am? It's not easy, but I'm going to try.

"3">Sometimes I love to feel and act just like a little toddler, especially when I am in my crib at night, thickly diapered and sucking on my baby bottle.

Other times I feel like an 8 year old who enjoys doing things like playing in a pool with a squishy squid and a battery driven toy boat and bumping up against women with big tits - but who also has trouble keeping his pants dry.

Sometimes I feel like a 13 years old who dresses in oversized shorts and an oversized t-shirt, and who wishes he could find time to ride his skateboard and his BMX bike - and who still has trouble keeping his pants dry.

Most of the time, however, I am an absolutely crazy workaholic who sits for hours in front of a hypnotic computer screen thinking about ways to make adult babies and diaper lovers happy. Wearing diapers, of course.

But who is the "real" me?

Why do I enjoy holding on to these attributes of childhood. Part of the reason is because it's fun.

Part of the reason is because this "kid" in me is an eternal optimist and idealist who thinks the world can be made into a better place. This "kid" in me loves life and thinks that most of us are wonderful people who want to be happy and make others happy too.

This 13 year old real me has written the following article for you to read. I think it tells more about me better than if I wrote 100 more pages of boring details about my life.

This is a special report from the Associated Press.

New York, United Nations, July 30 1996.

(Text Of Speech Given This Afternoon by the Prime Minister of Israel, the Honorable Benjamin Netanyahu)

"My Dear Friends, It seems to me that much of the history of mankind has been a constant interaction of cultures. This interaction has often taken the form of one culture invading another culture, either destroying it, or overthrowing it and forcing the ideas of the winning culture upon the losing one. Back and forth, over the map of Europe, the Near East, and in fact the world, this has gone on for centuries. In it's wake, millions of people have been subjected to misery. People have lost their lands. People have lost what was meaningful and dear to them. They have lost their self respect. They have lost their lives. And the winners of one era often have become the losers of subsequent eras. Misery has followed misery for century after century. During the past few years, the horrors in Bosnia have been, in many respects, a continuation of the misery that was originally created when the Ottoman Empire conquered the Christian nations in that area of Europe hundreds of years ago - which were then were reconquered by the Christians.

Although no peoples of the world have been spared this kind of horror, none have suffered as heavily and as continually as we Jews. In defense of our culture, over the centuries our people developed the concept that we would not disappear, but would live on from generation to generation. While we have succeeded in this goal, for many thousands of years we have experienced this misery again and again, a culture always being replaced, always being removed, always being reviled. Our experience has not been different from other cultures; it's only the constant repetition that has been somewhat unique.

More than any other people in the world, we know in our hearts what it means to have no homeland. The message of our Passover Seder is a deep expression of man's desire to escape this kind misery.

About a month ago the people of Israel elected me to head a new government, a government that seemed bent on moving away from the peace initiative towards a harder stand against those whom we perceive as our enemies, the Arabs and particularly the Palestinians. With great sadness and with tears in my eyes I knew this was true. Yet, strangely, in my mind, I also began to picture the possibility of a completely different approach. I began to see in Israel the possibility for a new beginning. I looked at our history and at the history of the other nations of the world and I said to myself, "Enough. It's time to try something different"

While we will never give up our desire to maintain and protect our homeland, we can see that the Palestinians also have a right to a homeland and to be free from the misery of being torn from the things that are dear to them.

Working with the brightest minds in our nation and with the leaders of all parties in our government, we have developed a new program for dealing with this problem - and it is my honor and pleasure to present it today to this meeting of the United Nations.

Our new program is aimed at uniting the people of Israel and Palestine into a new nation built on the premise of love for all. We believe that our God loves both Jews and Palestinians, and that their God loves both Palestinians and Jews. We believe that God's love shows itself through the good actions of men, through whom, and only through whom, God's love flows. Effective today, the following changes are being made in Israel and in the areas heretofore known as the West Bank and the Gaza Strip.

All Palestinians are granted total and complete citizenship in our new nation. All Palestinians now have the same right to run for office and be elected to the Knesset as do Jews.

Effective immediately, for every dollar that Israel spends on roads in Jewish areas, the same number of dollars will be spent in Palestinian areas. The same is true for new or remodeled schools, for new housing, for new settlements, for new public works. Israel is building a new center for the development of computer sciences and technology, and we invite Palestinians to join us in this effort. We will start by building two new Universities, one in the old Gaza strip and one in the West Bank areas of our new country

I am happy to announce that all borders and separations that have kept Jews and Palestinians apart have, as of 12 noon today, been removed forever. We now encourage Palestinians to move into the Jewish sections of our country, and vice versa. Government loans are available to help, wherever we can, people with little means to make these kinds of moves.

Furthermore, for every new Jewish Temple we build or every one that we remodel, we will build or remodel a Mosque for our Palestinian brothers and sisters.

Lest any of you think that these changes are being made without considerations for the economics of these tasks, our best thinkers believe that in the long term, these investment will be beneficial for our new nation. The money previously spent on hate and separation will no longer be needed for that purpose; instead it will be invested for the future of all our people. We believe that our new Palestinian brothers and sisters can and will make a great contribution to our economy, though it may take some time and investment. We can certainly benefit from any help from the other nations of the world, but are ready to go it alone if necessary.

I wish to close my talk by simply asking for a moment of silent prayer for the success of this new beginning. If our new nation succeeds in this manner, then the seeds of a new world may have been planted, and all of humanity will benefit. Thank you all, and may God bring peace to all the countries represented in this great hall. Thank you, and good afternoon".

At the conclusion of Mr. Netanyahu's speech there was a full minute of total silence. Then the roar of applause and the yells of support was so loud it was heard outside in the street. Minutes later, members of the United Nations were seen emerging from the building with tears in their eyes. Mr. Netanyahu was called to the phone and received an invitation from President Clinton to join him for dinner at the White House, which he accepted. In addition, Mr. Netanyahu also issued an invitation to all the leaders of the world to come to Israel next week for a informal dinner in tents to be set up in the main square in the old part of Jerusalem. Within minutes, cables of acceptance were being received from leaders from all over the world.

This has been a special report from the Associated Press. Further developments will be brought to you as they occur.

Dear Friends, the above article is not true. If you are upset to learn that it is not true, then maybe you are something like me - a 13 year old boy with strong hope for his future and the future of all mankind. Love, Tommy

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